So, what does love have to do with it – humility, that is?
I have been studying this week about “unconditional love” for a class
that I teach to mentors and about “humility” for my ladies Sunday morning Bible
study class. It dawned on me this
morning that love is all about humility and that humility is a required
ingredient for unconditional committed love. I see this played out on the pages of my Bible and in the
lives of my family and friends.
In Scripture, God revealed His love for all people, the
good, the bad and the ugly, by sending His Son, who suffered the shame and pain
of crucifixion, to provide a way for all to experience an eternal relationship
with the Almighty, One and Only God.
Jesus exemplifies humility. Jesus was and is God, yet He did not use His divine status
for His own purpose and gain. Out
of His humility He showed love and out of His love He chose to be humble.
Have this attitude in yourselves,
which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God,
did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself . .
.. He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on
a cross.
Philippians 2:5-8
The two greatest humbling experiences in my life have come
from love relationships: marriage
and parenthood. These begin with an
overwhelming emotional love, but love that is lasting and unconditional comes
when we are humbled in and through these relationships. In this season of life
I am watching the beginning and the development of these relationships in my children. My daughter is engaged and in the midst
of planning and preparing for her wedding day. She is in love, but soon after
the wedding she will experience what it means to be humbled by love. Even now, during the planning she has
been faced with many difficult decisions regarding such things as the number of
bridesmaids to have, the best photographer, and the colors for the bridesmaids
dresses and groomsmen suits. In this process she made this statement, “I want
to be considerate of what he (the groom) wants.” She is taking the first steps in learning what it means to
love unconditionally. Just as
Jesus chose to set aside His divine rights to fulfill God’s purposes, a husband
and wife must choose to set aside their rights to self-gain in order to fulfill
God’s purpose for marriage. Tina Turner may sing that love is just a
second-hand emotion, but the truth is, love is not only an emotion, it is also a
choice to be humble. When we demand
our rights, rather than humbly considering others above ourselves, it never
ends well. Lasting love lasts
because people choose to put others before themselves. That takes humility.
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of
mind,
regard one another as more important than yourselves.
Philippians 2:3
My son and his wife have just recently become parents to my
precious granddaughter, Isla Rose.
Moments after Isla was born I received pictures of the brand new
family. My son and
daughter-in-law’s faces glowed with an awe-filled love. A couple of weeks later I had the great
joy of spending a week with the new family. The sleep-deprived parents were still over-the-moon in love
with their precious Isla, but the romance of parenthood was giving way to the
reality of sacrificial love. Every
moment of each new day was now filled with meeting the needs of this tiny human
being. She had to be fed, bathed,
changed, swaddled, soothed, and watched constantly. Changing dirty diapers is humbling, but it becomes second
nature because you love her, sacrificially. Parenting can also be humiliating! When my daughter was two, she began to exert her will with a
vengeance. I remember once in the
grocery story when I had lightly swatted her leg for some act of disobedience,
which I can no longer recall, that she loudly proclaimed, “Mommy, you are
hurting me!” (With no tears I might add!) At that moment I wanted to find a
rock to crawl under in embarrassment.
That was only the beginning of many more humiliating experiences as a
mom. Because I loved her, I
persevered and learned that it wasn’t about how good I looked as a mom, but how
well I loved my child. Often I had
to discipline my children out of love.
I wanted the best for them and so correction and instruction were
necessary. Selfishly I wanted to
let it all slide, have fun and keep the peace. In love, I had to choose to put aside my own interest and do
the right thing. That takes humility.
Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for
the interests of others. Philippians
2:4
God continues to teach me how to love and live humbly. The lessons so far have revealed one
solid truth – you cannot have one without the other.
He has showed you, O man, what is
good. And what does the Lord
require of you? To act justly and
to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.
Micah 6:8
Humbled by His love,
Nancy
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